Tears hidden, the sun beating down, the waves just a few feet away. The lights. the salsa music in the bathroom as i tried so hard not to hyperventilate, your questions, your comments, the blank stare and i'm not eating again. I'm going nowhere again and running blades across my skin in the daylight of my car all alone again but this time not so hard cause i'm too afraid and not leaving a mark and not even cutting just wishing i were because there's no reason worth this pain again. back and forth, jumping over seats, don't say a word, silence is key. they can't know they affect you if you never say a thing. paranoia and illegal happenings in your basement, cheat until you've over acheived, fake it until it's real, and i'll hide until it shows through. the games we play and the day is barely even over.