Badly Written Poetry

I.

A thousand new colors and i've read my story aloud.

All i wanted was to whisper to you in the darkness.

Aren't i worth fighting for?
Worth screaming over?

Aren't I worth it?

And before you answer and break my heart,

can i tell you something?

I've tried so hard for you,

to be beautiful and strong
and smart
and artistic.

And all of these without being

hopeful
afraid

While being wistful.

I wish i could give you my thousand words
could paint you my million pictures
could tell you the stories and poems
and i wish you would

understand.

I wish you knew their worth,

my worth.

II.

Hair pinned back,
flowing, straight, soft in a thousand places.
Dark reminiscent of words like ebony, marble, coal
Held back with a rose, white and delicate.

I would give the world for delicate.

Dressed in black with half my face covered and dirt beneah my fingernails.

I felt beautiful again,
but only in my misery,

And you weren't even there to see.

III.

Silly monsters with new pencils
half sheets of paper
invisible bugs to leave scars
empty phonelines to stop tears
dirty brushes and
red ribbons
and dusty discs untouched for years
and a box i made for you, just you,
and a touch too far away,
and the voice, that voice of raspy deep agony.