I feel so lost... so small. so tiny. so little. Like i'm 4 again the day before christmas in an overly crowded mall. all alone with everyone pushing and shoving past as the world seem to get larger and i got smaller and my fears were going crazy in my head and the tears streaming down my face and the screams echoing. but still being ignored. That day, eventually, a stranger picked me up, a crowd began and my parents came rushing back all in a matter of 10 minutes. this time i've lost myself and only i can find me again. Find what i really want and what will really be most beneficial. I need to pick myself up, figure out whats wrong through all the confusion and tears, and then do my best to find my happiness. Because if i can't then no one else will. and i shouldn't need everyone to convince me to act upon my own interests.