Things to Remember

Goodbye will not be easy.

tears cannot be avoided.

pain is inevitable.

please god. please help me. please stop this.

Dear friend, you are not comforting. you are not consoling. You are condescending. You say "oh your pain. your silly pain. been there. done that. you silly girl with your silly tears."

Please let me find my voice. please let me scream this away. please let me be loud in everything but this ache.

No work. no school. no reason to leave bed. I don't know what to do. i have nothign to do. i'm on the verge of begging you to stay.

I would say, " PLease hold me. please never let me go. please make this stop. don't leave me. don't leave me. Don't make us do this. I need you. please don't leave me. "

I'd get on my knees and pull you down with me. I would whisper and scream and cry. I wouldn't want to let you go.

But you have to. you have to.

And i'm sorry for never being enough.