Another Sad Song for a Sad Heart and a Sad moment to call your own

For an hour I've been trying to force myself to sleep. I can't anymore. 'm plagued by dreams of you. It's too hot between the blankets. The apprehension won't fade. I keep thinking you'll be here. Even through sleep the twists and turns are felt.

I'll refuse to eat again and again for reasons I don't even understand.

The violin, polls, pictures, I can't remember what was real and what's not.

He never understood me. Understanding is overrated.

I'm lonely. I need someone to talk to.

lonely. How awful is this. Lonely. Since when.

I began to think of the last time my body felt an absence like this. And it can't remember. Years, to be completely honest. years. what the HELL!?

Hold me, I'll say. Alone again.

empty beds. Empty phones. A dead internet.

please be here for me. Please give me. Please take me. Please me.

I'm aching in desperation. This hurts my body. My body.

I have too many unneeded commas, too many words in italics. To many parentheses (but mostly because I like them).

Too many and not enough.

"Give me miles of mountains and I'll ask for the sea" is what he says.