To The Someone You May Not Expect Part Two: The You

I think of you and feel a slight ache in my heart. only slight. because there's nothing i can do. nothing i can do anymore.

but tehre wasn't ever a thing i could do. not a thing any of us could do. not a thing that anyone that's ever loved you could do.

I wish i could give you simple answers or simple gifts or simple promises like everyone else. I wish i could look them in the eye and seem strong, but i can't do that with you. I haven't been able to in so long.

I have a secret i can tell only you, the you that always understands but i know you'll have nothing to say but "ok." I wish you'd make a big deal of it. hurt over it. if only to prove you loved me again. loved me like you used to.

But That's why we forget, forgot how to love one another, because it hurt too much. Because my pain was too strong. andyour pain stronger. And i tried to be strong for you, and you tried to be stonger.

And we let it eat away at us, chip away at us. at us. at us. at us.

there is no more us. only me in my life and you in yours. and only grasping hands during times of desperation. only cries of help in pleading voices.

But i want to tell you now, tell you that I love you. That I wish a thousand things and only for you. I wish I could be all the things you need me to be, to be all that you want me to be. I wish i could give you the things that even I have not found yet. I wish you could find what you are looking for.

I wish you could feel again. love again. be innocent again. be stronga nd hopeful and full of lofty dreams again. I wish you would stop doubting and stop hurting.

I wish you could find the magic of everyday moments and every day love.

I wish saying all this could somehow affect you. and could somehow reach you, the you inside that i know is bleeding.